Posted by: DD | April 30, 2006

No. 175 – Confabulous 2: The Drinkening (More Fab Than Drink)

For over a week, you have caught snippets about the great Confab that was hosted most graciously by Alexa for the second time in a row last Sunday. I was so damn excited I almost got over the fear of meeting someone I really didn’t know. Communications though emails, phone calls and blog posts just cannot prepare one for that. Especially me, as I knew I would finally be exposed as the wallflower I really am. I’m an observer not an instigator. Considering how this past week as far as weather has gone in the Midwest (rainy and cold), we got incredibly lucky: Sunday shaped up to be one of the prettiest and warmest days of Spring we have had so far.

I got a little lost on my way to Alexa’s Mother’s house, and only did so because I didn’t read the directions Alexa had sent me. I pulled up to the house, called Mr. DD to let him know I had arrived safely, took a deep breath and rang the doorbell.

Erin had given me a heads up on what to expect from Alexa so I wasn’t surprised when this cute, girl with natural blonde hair, cut into a short, stylish pixi cut opened the door. I felt so stupid when I introduced myself as if I was entering an interview, realizing after the words were out of my mouth I would be no one else as Alexa had already met the other expected guests. I was the first to arrive so I didn’t have a chance to blend into the woodwork to be the observer I had hoped.

Within a few minutes, Alexa’s IRL friend Jennifer arrived, and while Alexa busied herself with some last minute kitchen prep, we stood on the enclosed porch overlooking a wooded backyard. I decided to uncharacteristically jump in with both feet and said to Jennifer, “You know, when I drive by big patches of overgrown woods or large deserted fields, I think to myself, ‘That would be a good place to hide a body.'” Brief pause…faint chirping of crickets. “I do, too!” She exclaimed back. Thank god! I liked her immediately.

Jennifer has dark hair, cut into a shoulder length bob and wearing the type of stylish glasses that if I could find in Small Town, I would never have to wear contacts. Later I found out that she was gearing up for her second IVF in early summer, but as Alexa had mentioned in her own post, was a blogging virgin. I hope that she soon is up and posting before her IVF cycle so we ALL can share our own version of assvice and support with her. As we were standing out on the porch, a beautiful petite, red-headed whirlwind came in and gave me a hug before I could even blink. It was Molly. I felt like an ogre standing next to her.

Even though Alexa had set and prepped the table in the dining room, we decided to enjoy the weather and planted ourselves in the eclectic group of chairs on the porch. Just as we had all settled in, the neighbors came home and caught Alexa’s attention and asked her to see if she could keep her Mom’s dog’s barking down as their baby was sleeping. Now the thing is that the dog had initially barked her “hellos” when we each made our arrival, but by that time had settled down. The irony of four infertiles being told to keep it down because the baby was sleeping was not lost on us. And when Alexa mentioned how sometimes the same neighbors partake in home-nudity and the nature of their relationship, we would instantly hush each time one of them would come out of the house to take out the garbage or walk their own dogs. I think we were picturing in our mind how they would look naked…and to be honest, it wasn’t pretty.

We ate, we drank, we talked and laughed. Poor Jennifer would sit silently bemused each time we mentioned a blogger and we would try give her the condensed version of said blogger’s status. And there were moments of comfortable silence as we transitioned from one topic to the other. I had one occassion where I realized I was “showing” my age when I voiced my opinion about how I thought Harrison Ford was attractive. The relationship Calista has with him doesn’t seem so weird when one is close to her age (read: born in the ’60’s) unlike my younger counterparts. Whippersnappers.

We made a few attempts to reach Erin on her cell phone since by 2:00 she had not made an appearance. Our worry was turned to disappointment when we got the email that her family had turned up sick at the last minute. We “regrettably” had to split up her share of the food and drink between us. We did this until about 6:00 when we collectively agreed it was probably time to go.

True to her word, Alexa handed out goody-bags each with an aromatic candle, a facial and a tiny acorn charm, which symbolizes wisdom, truth, strength, birth and fruitfulness. I had taken the Lush soap that Oro had sent to me with her copy of Taking Control of Your Fertility book and divvied it up for everyone to enjoy. Erin, I was assured that Alexa would send you your bag. If you don’t get it, I’m sure it’s because of the USPS. Really.

Even though the subsequent days ended up being a heart-breaking time for me, I am ever so grateful that I had that weekend, which makes me smile whenever I think of it. The Confab weekend with fabulously beautiful with strong women. I hope that there are many more and that those times are part of celebrations and congratulations for what we each have been struggling for. If too much time passes, I may throw out my own invite for a Nebraska Confab. Any of you who can make it are most certainly welcome.



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