Posted by: DD | September 29, 2006

no. 283 – I’m Only Lucky In Love

So-oo-o, I get this really shitty news yesterday that I’ve got one pathetic follicle (actually ONE is pathetic, but I should give my follicle the benefit of the doubt and believe that it is at least healthy and mature). All other cooter related details look great: nice lining, the numbers from the bloodwork look good and the donor we finally selected has a 43% pregnancy rate – which is also good) but we didn’t know what to do.

A couple of things that I read yesterday helped me make a decision. One was an email from DinoD which summed up our dilemma like this: continue the cycle with a little hope or cancel, which would effectively make it a hopeless cycle (barring a turn-around in attitude from Mr. DD’s drowners swimmers). (There is actually another male-issue I have never discussed and if you ever come back and the site has been locked back up, use your login and password I already gave you and I might have to share that sometime.)

Anyhoo…

There was this post from Erin and how she will do what ever she can to insure that they will never have to turn away another referral due to money. Financially, we do not have very much at all invested into this cycle. The follistim was donated to me and HcG is cheap in comparison, and we only had two clinic visits. The largest expense in this cycle will be the donor sample of approx $500. Could I have used this money to buy X a quad-bike instead? You bet, but in the grand scheme of things I’d rather have another baby instead of the kid I have breaking his neck on one of those death-machines.

I knew in my gut that I want to have hope, little as it is, but I thought Mr. DD would need convincing. I prepared in my head my argument for why we should go through with the cycle, but it was unnecessary. He never really thought for one moment we should cancel. So last night we triggered at 10:00 and our IUI is Saturday at 7:15 am. Our clinic will not thaw the sample until "they see the whites of our eyes" (yes, the nurse’s words exactly). Even though I think it’s silly, Mr. DD insists that we come back home directly after the procedure and that I am to stay in bed for the rest of the day. Sure beats the alternative and that is going to Nebr Furniture Mart and getting into a yelling match in front of one of the sales men like we did after the other two IUIs last year.

And I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for this to be such a long post, but I wanted to address Boulder’s comment, too (and I always welcome advice, especially when I don’t ask): Even if we canceled this cycle, we would not be able to cycle again next month. I’m prone to cysts after a medicated cycle, so we would be out at least one round and the earliest we would be able to cycle again would be November. Also, my doctor isn’t into the suppression, even when we did our IVFs. The only suppression meds I took were Antagon and that was during CD10-13 to help any lagging follicles catch up before aspiration. I get mixed messages on suppression, but I certainly think we need to dig into that option more for the next time.

…But of course, I’m hoping there won’t be a next time. So if you’ve been checking in (yeah, you, Skanky Ho) and not sure what kind of vibes to send my way, I hope this helps. Just do not tell me you are "crossing your bits" (as I have no clue as to what "bits" you are crossing that could possibly be crossed) and any baby dust on this site will be quickly swept up and left at the post office, which would effectively shut down the mail system as it would probably be mistaken for anthrax.

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Responses

  1. It’s exactly what I would do. Go for it.

  2. Oh…I REALLY hope this works! I am so sorry about the one follicle business. But you’re right: some hope is better than hopeless. And of course, normal people who just ovulate all on thier own only ovulate one follicle at a time, and I hear many of them manage to reproduce this way…

  3. Is that “Skanky ho” comment aimed at me or Tertia because I know I didn’t have anything relevant to say to the last post other than I’m thinking of you and I’m pretty sure you already know that.

  4. The “Skanky Ho” in this case if my beautiful Canadian counterpart, Ms. DinoD.

    I thought everyone knew that.

  5. Damn! Just lost my comment!

    I agree with you that a little bit of hope is better than none at all.

    Glad you are going for it.

    Your blog hasn’t been showing up on my blogroll as “updated” so I have been missing out! I need to go back and read what’s been going on!

  6. Whew, glad you clarified that skanky ho comment. I was starting to feel bad for obsessively checking in to see your decision.

    I’ll cross all the bits while I obsessively check in over the 2WW.

  7. Once again, if I could wrap up my seeming ability to get pregnant at the drop of a hat and mail it off to you, I would. Failing the ability to do that, I will just pray for success for you.

  8. Skanky Ho’s all the way ’round then. I’m glad you’re going forward with this cycle. Although the next two weeks will be filled with much angst and anticipation, I will be hoping for the best.

  9. Hope the singular follicle likes partying with the new guy and produced a singleton. I think 43% is a mighty nice number.

  10. Didn’t the Bible say that the greatest gift among, faith, love and hope was hope? I didn’t know what to say about your last post, so I kept it short. I am in the hope camp. I can’t predict the future, but at least this way there won’t be any “what if?s” to contend with down the road. This one follicle is ready. Why not give it a chance.

    [Please do not take this the wrong way] Can I hop in bed with you Saturday? I will be jealous of you tomorrow!

    You have all my best wishes!

  11. After reading this post, and your decision, I am more convinced than ever that most of the world’s problems would be solved if women ran the show. Seriously. Chalk one up for hope. I am smiling right down to my, well, bits, if you must know.

    (Okay, okay, your husband can be Secretary of…something, as he is insisting that you stay in bed and all that. Pretty excellent thinking.)

  12. Always err on the side of hope 🙂

  13. I was hoping you would go for it! Our thoughts and prayers are with you two as always.

    Mel

  14. Baby dust makes me sneeze.

    Am thinking of you today as you lie in bed relaxing. Sending thoughts that those little buggers will be swift and sure.

  15. Crossing fingers and toes for this cycle. Good luck!

  16. I’m proud of you for going for it! Best wishes and I’ve got everything crossed for you.

  17. I hope that everything went well this morning, I really really hope that this is a lucky cycle for you. I hope you have some left over valium you can take today!

  18. Dear Gnarly Troll (because I assume you are feeling a tad better)

    So.. I take it the “skanky ho” moniker is not something to be proud of????? Who knew?

    And apologize for checking your blog incessantly? Don’t you send us some sort of reward for driving your stats?

    Anyway… hope the IUI went without a hitch and that… (oh lord, I don’t know what to say here – everything just seems too invasive of your privacy).

    I’ll just say that I hope everything is going swimmingly (groan).

    Love, Skanky Ho (and proud of it – “give me an S”, “S”)

  19. And?

  20. Hope that the IUI went off OK. Good luck with the 2ww!

  21. I hope the IUI went well. I’m so glad you decided to go for it, and that Mr. DD was right there with you. Now all we can do is hope… 43% is great odds!

  22. Well, I’ll just wish you luck . . . because you know I’m all about luck.

    (A bit luckless today, but whatever)

    So . . . GOOD LUCK!

  23. Ok, not crossing anything, but hoping nonethless.


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