no. 352 – We’ve Officially Been Countrified

If the past 48 hours is any indication how 2007 is going to go, I am royally fucked.

An ice-storm of mythical proportions (pictures later) (and maybe not so mythical) came through and left us, us – as in most homesteads west of Small City city limits – without power.

Saturday afternoon, whilst my husband was away, X and I went into town to run some errands. Upon our return at approximately 4:30 I pulled into our driveway and pushed the garage door opener…and pushed again…and pushed again with increasing force. Nothing. I figured the ice had sealed the doors and after giving them a good pounding and kicking, climbed back into my vehicle to again jab uselessly at the door opener.

I climbed back out and after nearly cracking my head open on the driveway, made my way around to the side door. Locked. I used the key I had on my fob. Didn’t work.

Much cursing ensued.

I drove to the front of the house (yes, "drove", it was that freaking icy) and tried the key there. Didn’t work. I come to the conclusion that the key on my fob is the one that the contractors used to get in the house and once they were rekeyed I did not replace it with the new one.

I call Mr. DD and reamed him out for not making sure I had the new key on my fob and rant some more about why it’s going to take him another hour yet to get home when he’s only 60 miles away. What are X and I to do while we wait? We will surely freeze to death in our car!

Oh, shut up. I know it’s only a 10 minute drive into town.

Mr. DD suggests I check the deck door as I had went outside that morning and I have a habit of not locking it. Ha! I decide to prove him wrong and stomp around to the back of the house and give a mighty pull to the door, sure that it will not budge and I nearly get my arm torn from its socket when it slides easily open.

I’m in the house! Yeah! Jubilation! Flip the switch!

Nothing.

And of course I flip it again. And again. And then walk over to the next light panel and flip it. Nothing. Hurumph. No wonder the garage door wouldn’t open.

I call Mr. DD back not using my screaming-and-high-pitched voice to let him know what has happened. He gives me instructions on how to get into the garage and I pull the car back around and we are safely inside.

Except we are safely inside a house with no power, it’s getting dark and SWEETJESUS! there is no TV! No running water! And there is NO T.V.!!

Mr. DD calls again and suggests I meet him and his father for supper figuring by the time we get home, power will be restored.

By the time we got back home at 8:30 pm, power has NOT been restored. We pack a few overnight things and head to a hotel (we can’t stay at any of our family’s or friend’s homes as they all have some version of cat or dog and I’m out of albuterol and not feeling like spending the early morning hours in a hospital emergency department receiving breathing treatments), and miraculously find a room and crash for the night. Power will surely be restored by morning.

Sunday morning. We drive back out to the house. Still. No. Power. It has dropped to 55 degrees inside the house and I succeed in only getting the Christmas tree put away and cleaning up the kitchen. We have used up what little water was in the pipes. The electric company’s answering service can only tell us that the "crews have been out all night blahblahblah." We realize that spending another night in a hotel is not ideal. That’s if we find a room on New Year’s Eve. We also realize that not selling our house in town has finally shown an upside. All utilities are still on.

After hitting Tarjay as soon as they opened and buying the last three full sized air mattresses on sale and going back to the house for frozen pizzas, soda, blankets, towels and toys (and later the kitchen TV and DVD player), we are back at our house in town, bored out of our everlovin minds.

X is becoming increasingly antsy and highly annoying. He starts asking as early as 6:00 pm if it’s time for bed as he is anticipating sleeping on his "new" bed. The only thing that keeps us from telling him it is indeed bedtime is the realization he will be very awake by 5:00 the next morning and I would rather sleep in a running car then deal with that bullshit.

After freezing our asses off (air mattresses do not hold body heat so well), we awoke to the sun shining and making for some once in a lifetime sights as trees glistened like million dollar chandeliers and the lawns were full of glitter.

But still…

…we have no electricity and we are feeling a bit displaced and crabby. I couldn’t even get my morning mocha from the coffee place as they are closed for the holiday. If I have to spend another night NOT at home, I’ll go from being angry to being very depressed.

I just want to go home.