Posted by: DD | January 24, 2007

no. 366 – A Bad Day-Relatively Speaking

We received notice from our home-owners insurance carrier that they are terminating the policy on the house we are trying to sell because it’s vacant. We will now be raped by inflated premiums until the house gets sold.

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X had a really bad day at school yesterday and even had to talk with the principal. He just turned 5. He’s a preschooler, for god’s sake!

Mr. DD and I are meeting with his teacher today after school.

What if he turns into a juvie? What’s wrong with him? What’s wrong with us?

I don’t know how I’m going to remain neutral when anyone criticizes, even if constructive, someone I love with all my heart.

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Responses

  1. Who says you have to be neutral?! You’re his MOMMY, for cryin’ out loud!!

    Listen, good. Neutral, bad. ‘Cause whatever is said, you’re SUPPOSED to be on his side!!
    And love him and hug him and …. Yeah!!

    BTW, thanks for being so sweet to me yesterday!! It meant a lot to me!

  2. You don’t need to be neutral, just keep an open mind. With my kids, I try to see all of them, the good, the bad, the indifferent. I love them dearly, but they can be little jerks sometimes, and they can also be well-behaved.
    Hard to hear from a teacher though, you have my sympathy. Good luck!

  3. Good Luck with the meeting.
    There’s nothing wrong with you or X . .. everyone’s allowed a bad day, right? Even a preschooler.

  4. Neutral – no way. Willing to help X, certainly. AS a parent you can at least recognize when he does something that he should not do, and are willing to help him correct his behavior the way you feel best suits him because you are the parent.

    Are you going to be able to work/concentrate today? I would be viciously planning out scenarios in my head and have my witty responses crafted. I hope this principal does not give you the opportunity to use any of your responses, BUT don’t give him/her any opportunity to say “he must get …..from his mother”. My SIL (the teacher) uses that one.

  5. Yikes teachers, that scares me in the future. Good thing I have you to tell me all about it so I will be ready. Hope all goes well. (If not I hope you have learned the fine art of telling someone off without them even knowing it! I am sooo bad, please forgive me if there are any teachers reading this!! 🙂 )

    Sorry about the insurance, that sucks. They should at least take into account that there is less to steal/damage in an empty house, ugg!

    Take care

  6. Wow. I’m kind of surprised by all of the anti-teacher/principal comments. I guess I have always viewed it as us, as parents, being partners with them. Now – that said, we’ve had a couple of crappy teachers, and we’ve dealt with that via administrative channels, but for the most part, our experiences with the teachers have been very positive.

    They’ve only called us when there has been concerning behavior in the classroom/on the playground, and they needed our assistance to deal with it. Lots of kids go through that, and it’s ok. But if you go into it with the attitude that they’re saying you’re bad parents, or that your kid is bad, that’s going to come across negatively – to you, to the administrators and teacher, and to X. Instead, turn it around – look at it as we all have things to work on, and for X, there’s something he needs to do differently at school. (And trust me, it’s not that bad. We’ve gotten called because one of ours was using foul language, another punched his friend (!) in the nards…trust me….I’ve SO gotten over the stigma of “getting called to the principal’s office”.

    It’ll be fine. And some day, when X has his future wife over to visit, you can embarass him by talking about how you got called to the principal’s office when he was in PRESCHOOL!

  7. I have been worried about this myself. As a former teacher, how will I handle the parent/teacher relationship when the shoe is on the other foot? Not looking forward to it.

  8. First, I can’t believe that your insurance is going to charge you more for a vacant house. Have you looked into any other insurance companies?
    Second, I can NOT believe that you have to meet with the principal at a pre-school for ONE bad day. I know Alex had a rough 4th grade year because he had evil teacher who hated him and we had to meet with the principal after repeated detentions. But Pre-school issues, what did he do, stab another kid? One bad day does not constitute the need to meet with the principal.
    Finally, kids are so much more sensitive to what is going on around them then we ever give them credit for and you have been going through some major stress lately. Plus you posted that he acted up at home the other day too. Maybe the tension in the house is just getting to him?
    I hope that the meeting with the teacher goes ok. You may want to take her aside and let her know that things are kind of stressful at home and maybe she will cut him some slack. I know how hard it is to try and not be defensive and protective of your child. It might be worth it to just sit down with X when you get home and ask him if there is something bothering him, I know that worked with Alex. Call me if you need to talk about it.

  9. What did X have to say? I’m sure that you’ve talked to him about it, so maybe the Principal just wants to go over “ground-rules”. I’m sure that I’ll be a regular face in the office once Mag starts school. I don’t know *where* she gets this stubborn streak. :::looks away sheepishly:::


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