Posted by: DD | March 12, 2007

no. 400 – Things that make you go…WTFF!

So Advanced. It’s Easy.

What the fuck does that even mean?? And if I could aim my pee from 4 feet away as portrayed by this commercial, I could write my name in the snow. Hell, I’m sure I could even print it with no small thanks to kegels. Speaking of such, did you know men can do them, also? I’d be interested in know how many men are actually checking to make sure they have the right muscle. Ok. Maybe not. I won’t be volunteering my services, either.

Let’s talk about PMDD. Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder. I’m trying really hard not to be cynical about this, much like society did when they first heard of PMS, but for the life of me I cannot see what the real difference is between PMS and PMDD. You be the judge:

Weight gain from fluid retention
Abdominal bloating
Breast tenderness
Tension/anxiety Marked Anxiety
Depression mood Sadness & Depression
Crying spells "Periods of teariness"
Mood swings & irritability/anger "Marked" anger & irritability
Appetite changes & food cravings Changes in appetite
Insomnia Changes in sleep patterns
Joint/muscle pain Flu-like symptoms
Headache Headaches
Fatigue Fatigue/lethargy
Overwhelmed/out of control

A rather fine line, don’t you think?

My husband, with his desert-dry humor, pointed out in response to the peanut butter recall that he’s surprised that we just can’t leave it on the shelf since the "fat and oils would rise up and kill the salmonella – much like one’s heart." For some reason, I found this particularly funny.



  1. Yep, I woke up this morning and thought I was missing out on something in life…Now I know what it is. I have not been sticking my fingers up my a** enough!!

  2. For the PM stuff, isn’t it a matter of degree? There’s the anxiety with hand wringing, then there’s the anxiety that is out of control. But then I don’t really know. I figure it mirrors PPD which is a series of progressive intensities of symptoms.

    My PMS stuff was essentially gone, but these new bcps are kicking my butt. Add them to my docket of ills.

    Very clever PB comment. Ours stays around here so long, it probably invents its own diseases.

  3. Is it PMS if it runs for my entire 30 day cycle? My husband really wants to know…

  4. I hate that stupid commercial. I hate all those fucking commercials.

    PMS vs. PMDD — it probably all comes down to how much the patient feels like she really needs the extra help. I don’t see the distinctions, either.

  5. Spanglish – I think it comes down to whether or not the husband has medical degree; or whether or not the woman has just finished an IUI or IVF or FET cycle.

  6. A “Disorder” sounds so much more scientific (and manlier) than a “Syndrome.” Let’s face it, a little old Syndrome is for wimps. And what I get before AF shows up is definitely a Disorder.

  7. It’s in the last line – it comes down to control. I would consider myself to have plain ole’ PMS now. But I did go through a phase where I would put it more in the PMDD distinction. As my mother put it at one point, I could have murdered someone and totally gotten off because of the hormones related to my period. My personality would do a complete 180 – from pretty easy to get along with to completely irrational screaming bitch. I would completely lose control of myself. And if you knew what a disciplined person I am (and was even then), that 180 was pretty disturbing.

    Granted, my mom was really sensitive about it at the time- “All women have periods. GET OVER YOURSELF!”

  8. My Dad always said that I didn’t have PMS.. I had UMS (Ugly Mood Swings)

    Funny, when I hear the commercials on the radio, “Have you lost taking pleasure in things you used to enjoy? Do you have trouble sleeping? Feeling tense? Do you feel sad or unloved?” I’m in the car going,
    “Yes, yes, yes, YES!” Well, I’ll be! I’m not overworked, underpaid, stressed out or sleep deprived… I’m depressed!”
    That reads a little like West Side Story…

    Gee Officer Krupke…. Krup you!

  9. So what are they saying? PMS is strictly physical, while PMDD is mental/emotional? Maybe we all have PMDD then.

  10. I think we all must have PMDD. That line is pretty fine, I agree. What the heck is “marked” anger and “periods of teariness” my entire period is filled with teariness- hell, I can’t turn the waterworks off most of the month!

  11. I cannot tell you how hard I laughed when I saw that commercial! I can’t imagine how much one test costs. My husband was thinking about all the technology that was “wasted” in those things because they can only be used once. I have to agree.

    Regarding the peanut butter – it’s my favorite brand and I would have kept right on eating it if my husband hadn’t thrown it away. If I hadn’t gotten sick on the first half jar, why would I get sick on the rest?

    PMDD. I have to agree that this is a pretty fine line.

  12. And people wonder why I worship estrogen and refuse to give up my HRT. That estrogen/progesterone dip right before AF is hellacious, and menopause makes it even worse.

    But if people are on the pill, and not TTC, I have to wonder why do they even bother to go off? Why not just stay on the steady dose and NEVER get AF or PMS/PMDD?

  13. I came across these comments when I was looking for a board that had anything to do with people that are trying to concieve and have REAL PMDD, like me. Yes, alot of women suffer from PMS, and you could say that it’s very hard to tell the difference between that and PMDD, the difference for me is that it physically makes me ill aside from the obvious mood swings, etc. I have cramping, bloating for up to two weeks prior to getting my AF and sometimes on the day it comes I end up worshiping the porceline God for an entire day with a fever and cramps that are so unbarible I have to walk up and down the hallway outside of my bathroom to ease the pain inbetween episodes of loosing my stomach to the toilet. This has happened to me since I was a teenager, it wasn’t until now that they have a diagnosis for it. I was on BC to control it and life was fine, until my husband and I decided to try for a baby. Now 17 months into trying, I’ve changed my diet to help with my cycle and it has helped, tremendously, surprising how food can effect your moods, but if I go one month with cheating on the diet, just a little, it’s hell at the end of the month and every time, I wonder why I’m putting myself through this, and the answer is, all the pain is worth it in the end to have that bundle of joy. Plus, it turns out, my grandmother suffered with the same thing, she said her PMDD, or whatever you want to call this crazyness, went away with the birth of her first child, hopefully, I’ll be as lucky.

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