Posted by: DD | May 15, 2007

no. 443 – I’m a Rebel at Heart

There are a few things in my life that I look back upon, and though I don’t necessarily regret them happening, I do wish I had thought them through a little more thoroughly or had a better outcome.

Such is life.

Lately I’ve been thinking about not so much what I have already done, but what I wish I had done in my younger years that I would probably (eventually) regret as I age.

I wish that I had pierced more than just my ears. The first hole in each ear was done…lord, I don’t remember where (the family doctor’s office? the beautician’s?). The second hole in the right was done by me, at 18, by a very large safety pin and an ice cube.

I was a margarita away from piercing my belly-button many years ago. I was pre-pregnancy by a couple of years and still complaining about how Banana Republic never seemed to have size 4 left in any of their cute clothes. Rough life. Mr. DD’s niece had it done and that summer she came out to visit, I was totally envious of how it looked. I just couldn’t get beyond the fact no one else would see it. I was married and cropped tops and plumber-asscrack jeans were still a hideous trend of the future.

I even considered piercing my nose. Not a ring since I related nose rings to bulls (farm girl here), but a discreet little stud to balance the ginormous black-head the occasionally surfaced on the other side.

Tattoos are a great way of making a statement. It’s unfortunate that most of the time, they are usually associated with the kind of the ilk, "I am from the trailer park and I just spent my welfare check getting a tattoo of my dead ferret on my arm."

I haven’t forgotten April’s tattoo she got last year and I think of it and its coolness often when I try to imagine one on myself. I firmly believe that if I did get a tattoo, I want one that would rival any of the stories that are shown on Miami Ink. I would prefer Garvey do the work, by the way, as I think he’s one of the most talented and I find baldING men strangely erotic.

Unfortunately, I can neither chose a design nor a location. It doesn’t help that Mr. DD finds them Momtattoounattractive and threatens legal separation if I was to ever get a tattoo. May I introduce you to the most uptight Metal Head to ever grace the 80’s with crazy long hair? I did get a temporary tattoo from my son about a year ago. I think it’s rather charming. At least I can say "I got inked." Yes, I have long since washed it away.

I’ve considered the lower back location, but again, no one is going to see it there. Plus, imagine how hawtt it would be to have my granny panties peeking up over my jean’s waist band and acting as a stage for the tattoo. Maybe the nape of my neck? But doesn’t that sound painful? No to the upper arms, ankles and calves. While I would want something meaningful and mostly discreet, I could easily be convinced to go ape-shit and get a sleeve on my lower arm. Unfortunately, my employer forbids visible tattoos and I would have to bandage or cover it with long-sleeves every day I worked.

I would like something to honor the children I never parented without being cliche, so butterflies, fairies, angels and the like are O U T. If you have any thoughts on it, feel free to share.

I wonder if this would be considered part of my mid-life crisis? Fuck, that’s scary. Next I’ll want to trade in my soccermommobile and get a chopper (custom designed by Jesse James, of course).



  1. I am such a huge fan of body art, having several piercings and more than several tattoos. I agree, the tattoos should be meaningful. I have one that isn’t and I’d love to cover it up, and will someday with a new design. When I wanted one to honor my son, I chose a lower back tribal heart that I could work his name in to. If I had children I didn’t parent, I would do a design to work the initials in rather than the whole name.

    Even in this day and age, when I meet someone new they can’t keep their eyes off my visible tattoos – as if I do not look like the kind of person who would have one. Believe you me, honey – I can cuss like a trucker, too.

  2. I have a tattoo just above my shoulderblade that I got just after my 18th birthday to exert my independence. It was pre-Charmed (the TV show), but resembles the emblem on their book of magic:

    I want another, but my husband hates the fact that I even have one, the killjoy. I’m intent on getting another one, but I want to wait to see if we have another kid someday as I want the tattoo to represent P. and her (possible) sibling. I have a good friend that is an artist/illustrator and I want her to create the design.

    As for placement, well…a friend of mine has a symbol on the inside of her wrist and I love, love, love that location. However, how will it look when I’m 70? I think if I do get a tattoo to represent my kid(s), I’ll get it somewhere in the hip/stomach region.

    Back to you, this being your blog and all. I think the upper back is a good place, as you can uncover it when you want, but it’s not constantly visible. As for design, I am so crap at that kind of thing if it isn’t about me. Surprise, surprise. I’m with you on the cliched shit though. Ugh.

    Though the actual body art itself is significant, I find the most importance in the idea of the tattoo itself. Regardless of design, that permanent marker is there to symbolise something. You have placed that image on you to mark an important event/s, and it is there forever. I love that about tattoos. For the rest of my life I have something on my body which evokes a memory of being 18 and free to make my own decisions. I think it’s such a powerful medium.

    Ahem. I’ll shut up now. I look forward to hearing others’ ideas for you!

  3. Try this:

  4. I used to have a young friend who had her clit pierced. She said it was great fun to go over a bump in her minivan.

    I have wanted a tattoo for many, many years. I never could decide what or where and have played the same mental gymnastics you just played here. Similar, all the significant men in my life have been very opposed to the idea.

    Also, I had my first holes done when I was 15. I did my second myself with ice when I was 18.

  5. I have my ears pierced. 3 times. The 1st was in the 5th grade, 2nd was around 20, third was shortly thereafter. @nd & 3rd holes are now closed since every damn time I put an earring in, they would get all red & hurt like hell.
    As for tats, never ever ever in a million years.

    But I was thinking about this for you and what about
    1.) tiny little discreet “rings” around your pinky?

    2.) Or possibly your ring finger & then your wedding band could cover them at work, yet they’d still be there along with you & Mr. DD’s symbol of love.
    I don’t think your employer would be too too scandalized about that.

    3.)Or maybe real rings. Something fine & filigreed & dainty.

    Dang! I’m just full of ideas over here!

  6. you know, the gold dental aparatus is in vogue. why not get a gold grill with the imps names?

    Be the envy of the soccor mom set!!

  7. When I went to get my second tattoo there was a woman there who was probably in her 60’s there to get her other nipple pierced. The part that stuck with me was not both but “the other one” leading one to believe that the other one was already pierced.

    Having said that I love my tattoos… the first was done to cover up a scar and is on the underside of my right breast – it’s a thing of sunflowers…. simple, small, tasteful. The other is on my lower back – and it was done for a different reason. To remember what I’ve been through and to remember the things that have gotten me through. It’s in feng shui and it is the symbols for Harmony, Faith and Love… Now granted I’m not always harmonious, but I do generally have faith and I always have love… so those are the 3 things I need to keep me grounded. A friend has a tattoo to remember her miscarriages… and it was tasteful as well. I know Mr. DD would not encourage you to do that but if you explained why you wanted it to be your own way to honor your losses then I think he would be okay with it. Or you could go for the jewelry option – I just don’t wear much jewelry to make that an option for myself.

    You could put a tattoo around your belly button… or your lower hip there are many places to choose that are discreet… just a thought.

  8. I love that tattoos are so personal, mine are relevant to me, very unobtrusive (inside of my ankle and shoulder blade) and not of ferrets…..

    I have a gemini (sign of twins) and an egyptian ankh – both done after I lost each set of twins. I have Pepe Le Pew on my shoulder blade, it was a joke my cousin and I had and after he was killed I just went ahead and did it – you only live once!!

  9. Without being to cliche, I’ve always thought of my babies as being free as a bird in flight. Maybe too twee for you, but there it is anyway and if I were ever to get a tattoo (I would never!) but if i were, it would be a beautiful, elegant bird in flight, free from the troubles that we suffer with in our life.

  10. MsPru – I kind of like the idea of inside the wrist, discreet yet easy enough to show off. I let my son write there, but never thought of it as a perm location.

    Beagle – that test revealed I should get asian inspired characters. I do like that idea, but maybe with celtic symbols instead to honor part of my heritage.

    Cricket – No. Way. In. Hell.

    Cat – I haven’t worn my wedding ring in months. I could see the tattoo rings but no jewelry as I’m constantly beating up my hands outside (see flickr account).

    Dennis – If I got a diamond encrusted grill now, all the other soccer moms would wonder what took me so long.

    Sami – yes, I think Mr. DD would cave to just one based on its significance.

    Patience – I keep reminding myself of that, “you only live once.”

    Artblog – I do love the sentiment of the birds, especially since that lends itself to more colors than just symbols.

  11. Though my husband isn’t crazy about them either, I still haven’t given up on the idea of having a tattoo. I hadn’t before I met him because I’m complete chicken shit when it comes to pain. I even had a spot and a tattoo picked out. I was going to get a howling wolf (with a moon in the background) on my inner ankle. The wolf because it happens to be my (obsession) favorite animal.

  12. heh.. My first tattoo is on my ankle – it was occasionally a pain in the arse wearing tights instead of pantyhose when it was 100 degrees out (courtesy of another employer with a no-visible-tat policy), but other than that, it was very easy to cover and yet still very easy to show off. I do sometimes have that air o’trashiness going on at weddings and formal events, particularly if both my ankle and shoulder are visible, but hey – I embrace my trashiness I guess, it’s never bothered me.

    I have found that the more personal, meaningful tattoos are best suited for areas that do not get much public time. People ask the meaning behind the ink, and sometimes, it’s not something I want to share.

  13. I am allergic to metal, and I know this, but for some stupid reason I have pierced my ears three times and my belly button once. Everytime I have ended up with a horrible infection and had to let them grow over, but back then I wanted so very badly to be cool. My boyfriend who is now my husband thought that belly button rings were sexy. I remember my mom telling me how stupid I was, but guess who has a belly button ring now that she’s single? Yup, Ma…

    I would love to get a tatoo now, but ironically I am afraid of the needles. My sister has a small tatoo on her foot and it is so so cute. Maybe someday…

  14. I’m pierced, three holes in one ear, two in the other and one in my belly button. All of that was done between 6 and 19. I’ve also got a tat to the right on belly button that I love

    I got it done when I was 21 and even though there are a few stretch marks in it, I still love seeing it in the mirror. Now I’d like another one on my lower back. Honestly I want a Mickey head with the letter Z in it and some scroll work on the sides with my family’s initials worked in somehow.

    Anyway, if you want a tattto, do it, you’ll probably want more 🙂

  15. I have 3 tattoos. First one a shamrock, on my left hip bone, second Eeyore on my right hip, and the lizards from the Sob* drink bottles on my lower back. All of them are hidden but I can still show people them in public without getting naked. My reason for where I put them, was that if I ever got pregnant again they, hopefully, wouldn’t expand on me and then be all stretched out and saggy after losing the baby weight. I guess we will see if my reasoning was correct, eh? 😉
    The first two weren’t too painful but the one on my lower back hurt like hell.

  16. I have two tattoos – a chameleon on the small of my back that I got when I was going through some major life changes and the other is on my inner right ankle. I got it to remember my mother and to remind me of how I want to live my life. It’s the word “Grace” in script with an infinity symbol underneath… maybe something like that to remember Vivienne and Wolf?

  17. It’s funny you bring this up, because the hubster and I have been talking about it a lot lately (the tattoos).

    Have you thought about getting a white tattoo? (Not as easily visible if you do it on a wrist or ankle.) I also love the shoulderblade or lower back tattoos.

    Also, on the piercing – if you did it on the same side of your nose as the blackhead, and place the piercing in the right spot, couldn’t you cover the blackhead? 🙂 I’m all about creative camouflageing

  18. I wish I had thought more about my tattoo before I got it done; instead, we (J, my cousin, and I) just decided to get them and went to get them. My cousin and I have the same butterfly–hers is on her lower back and mine is on my outer thigh. I like it and I’m glad I have it, but I wish it was something meaningful. Then again, I’m not sure what “meaningful” would have looked like at 18.

    I occasionally think of getting another, but it would definitely need some consideration first. Tattoo date in SC?

  19. I used to be very pierced – in a classy way – a few in each ear, nose, belly button. IT never really had the rebel appeal I was searching out and now I rarely even wear earings…

    Tatos are a bit too permanent for committment phobic me, but I do really like them. A good friend had an art deco design hich she crafted up herself, tatooed around most of her leg. While it would be a bit bold for me, it is perfect for her. Perhaps you be your own artist??? If you do not feel so inspired, I am sure that I could e-mail you something fabulous (get me??) when I am not at work…….

  20. I have always wanted a tatoo of an acorn, but I could never decide where to put it. I did go for the nose stud piercing. But then I had to take it out for my law firm job. Oh well, it was nice while it lasted.

  21. I had my navel pierced about 3 years ago. I did it shortly after my miscarriage I think because I needed to have some physical pain to go along with my mental anguish. One day on a walk the ball came unscrewed, the bar slipped out, and it closed really quickly. Like within a few hours, I couldn’t put another piece of jewelry in. It sucked because I really liked it.

    A dear friend of mine recently got some tatoos and she keeps trying to entice me into getting one. I told her that “I want to want to get a tatoo.” I think if I ever did get one, it would be slightly darker than my skin tone, more like a birthmark, and be some sort of mythical symbol…. a Celtic knot or something. Or maybe baby footprints with names in them. I just don’t want anything blatantly colored. I would want it very subdued.

  22. The cleverest tattoo I can remember seeing was back in the early 90s. A woman had Woodstock (the little yellow bird from the Snoopy cartoon) on the side of her foot, peeking out of her pumps.

  23. I got a tattoo for my 30th birthday. It took me a REALLY long time to decide where to get it put. I didn’t want it anywhere that would sag at some point in my life, which left off most of the front part of my body. I didn’t want it in a place where it could inhibit my ability to get a professional job – hence none on the arms or legs below the knees. AND I didn’t want a “tramp stamp” which is the notso nice euphamism for the lower back which is visible when one wears lowriders and a thong. So. Mine is between my shoulderblades on the upper part of my back. It was an interesting experience. Periodically she, the artist, would hit a spot on my spine that would send a tingle all the way down to my fingers.

  24. I used to think tattoos were stupid, but I kinda wanted one. I figured they were a sign of youthful lack of foresight.

    However, time provided an occassion and I was 30, so I got one in the middle of my back, where I can’t see it so I don’t have to think about it. In the summer it would be easy to show it off without having to resort to silly clothes.

    My DH got the same one, but on his arm.

  25. Tattoos were too bad when you want be a good person or when you want to be employed person don’t make that in you’re body.

  26. I have friends with a variety of tattoos, but I have to admit I’ve never understood the desire to get something so permanent. At least holes will close up if you want to alter your appearanve or just plain change your mind.

    That being said, I’ve seen some nice celtic knotwork and symbols tattooed on people… Love the stuff! (Our wedding rings have matching celtic knotwork all the way around.)

  27. “…and I find baldING men strangely erotic.” Okay, that’s it — you’re never meeting my man because he is follicle(y)-challenged (obviously in a very different way than you or me) and he has the most wonderful Sean Connery-like sensuality you could ever dream of — and he’s all mine! 😉

  28. How about having X write “MOM” on your body – hip, shoulder, wherever – then go in and have it made permanent.

    It’s small, simple, and a symbol of so many things in just three letters.

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