Posted by: DD | June 8, 2007

no. 460 – Moving On in a Manic-Kind-of-Way

I’m feeling better, relatively speaking. My ass is a little sore from kicking myself for doing something no infertile woman who has a history of miscarriages should do, and that was calculating the due date. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. February 8, 2008, in case you were wondering.

Speaking of miscarriages, to clarify, this was my fourth. Sorry for the confusion. I have the category for fifth pregnancy as I am giving credit to that time when I was fertile, had a normal pregnancy and gave birth to my son, X. Can you believe that when I started blogging he was three? He’s now five. How time flies when you’re having spontaneous abortions. A rather gruesome thought, no?

When I talked to Dr. Blinksalot on Tuesday, she said that she and all of the staff were quite upset by this sad turn of events. I’ve become the office underdog. I wish I could say that it would boost my rank from the bottom to closer to the top of the donor egg list.

I have to admit that I really thought karma was on our side this time, as I know you did, too. Mr. DD’s count was back up. I had several good follicles. What you probably didn’t know is that we had used up all of our injectables, even the PIO. Surely that should have been a sign that we would need no more? I guess that was karma’s way of not only administering a judo chop to the side of my head but giving me an atomic wedgie. I won’t need much for a donor egg cycle, either.

Speaking of such, I wondered how easy it would be to find information on becoming an egg donor so of course I googled “become an egg donor” and some of the stuff I found gave me the huzz, quite frankly. This site in particular because of their “glamour shots” of donors in combination with the ages. 20, 21, 22? As nice as I’m sure their eggs are, I kind of like the policy my clinic follows and that is they want their donors to have already had “normal” children. These 20-somethings are still children, in my opinion. I’m old enough to be their mother. Hmmm, now there’s a cheery thought.

Many of you offered a hand in helping me if there was anything I needed. I thought of something some of you might actually be able to do. If you know someone who may qualify as an egg donor with our clinic (late 20’s, early 30’s, have completed their family, and an understanding that becoming an egg donor will not pay the kids’ college tuition, and live in either Nebraska or Iowa) maybe you can suggest they check out this site for more details. My clinic is the first one (hint, hint).

Yes, I am pandering for eggs. I will what is in my powers to do.

Segway of sorts. Have you all seen this??! My husband thought we should get one and use it. I said we’ve already paid hundreds and hundreds of dollars to know that my FSH is crap, and his motility is crap, so why would I pay another $100 to confirm that? Especially since it’s all irrelevant as we move on to Plan K, Subsection 42, Paragraph 3 that theoretically eliminates the crap? I did however, share the website with someone I know trying to get pregnant…

Before I go, I want to thank Mel and her husband for sending us flowers when you heard of our recent loss. I had them delivered to me at work. The lilies fill the hallway with their heavy, summer scent.

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Responses

  1. I’ve heard about the in-home fertility tests. Interesting….

    Holy crap, I can’t believe you have to drive all the way to Omaha! Wowser.

    Good luck with the donor list. I too think you should be bumped up if you’re now officially your clinic’s Underdog. Or we could get you a t-shirt.

  2. Damn. If I wasn’t 38, I would so be signing that register. Oh. And if I lived in Nebraska.

    I wish you all the luck, DD.

  3. I saw the home fertilization kit, it is a great idea.

    I do not know anyone in that area of the country but if I know anyone who knwos anyone, I will send them your way.

    Flowers are so nice.

  4. To your friend who is trying to get pregnant, please also recommend that she try the ClearBlue Easy Fertility Monitor.

  5. I saw that ad and I’d love to get it, but unfortunately, they won’t ship to Canada…grrr. Apparently we’re too stupid to pee on a stick without a doctor “counselling us about the results” *eyeroll* Yep, cause they’ve been so brilliant so far…

  6. Wish you and your husband the best of luck with this. I enjoy following your story, and think it’s inspirational to others.

  7. Don’t know if you’d want some 35 yo eggs, but they worked pretty recently…do I have to live out there? Seriously…

  8. Don’t know if you’d want some 35 yo eggs, but they worked pretty recently…do I have to live out there? Seriously…

  9. That egg donor site with the young girls is scary. Scary! You know they’re just doing it for the money. What bothers me is who knows the longer term affects of them donating, especially if they do it multiple times. Will there be a huge epidemic of self-induced infertility in the future? Maybe I’m talking out of my ass, but it makes me wonder.

    I hope you find a donor easily and that things get rolling quickly. Do you know how long the wait list typically takes at your clinic?

  10. Pander all you need – maybe you should start a separate site: Dialing for Donor Eggs. I wish I knew someone in your neck of the woods who could help.

  11. I think you summed it up – I hoped/prayed/etc because I thought darnit everything was right. Apparently I was wrong… I so wish I was wrong about that.

    As for the ED I would have signed up, however I doubt I would be excepted with all those miscarriages and I live in BFE a long way away from those 2 states. As for the at home fertility test – we did it. I became a bit paranoid about D’s count after the IUI and wanted some reassurance that his count wasn’t as awful as I feared it to be. Turns out the IUI was a fluke as the test had him in the “normal” range. We had agreed if it came up wonky we’d pay for the full s/a kind of thing.

    Sorry the egg donor sites are scary – I’m hoping that someone signs up quickly for you. I wish I knew someone closer… I’m fairly certain a friend of mine would sign up if given the information to help someone out, but she lives in the same state I do… Hang in there…

  12. I’m only now catching up, and I am *so* sorry, DD. FUCK!

  13. I really hope you find a donor quickly.

    Good luck!

  14. If you recruit the donor, do you get dibs? Or does it just move you another notch up the list? Does your clinic really insist that the donor be from Nebraska or Iowa? What if they’re willing to travel there to donate?

    It’s not that I have anyone in mind, I’m just trying to see if there’s a way to get the process to move a little faster.

  15. If you recruit the donor, do you get dibs? Or does it just move you another notch up the list? Does your clinic really insist that the donor be from Nebraska or Iowa? What if they’re willing to travel there to donate?

    It’s not that I have anyone in mind, I’m just trying to see if there’s a way to get the process to move a little faster.

  16. I thought karma would help you out too, even though I’ve given up thinking that way for myself. My due date was 2 Feb.

    Hope you get your donor very soon.

  17. Question: If you had good eggs and he had good sperm, why would getting a donor egg have a better chance of working?

  18. I’m sorry your ass is sore. I think it’s a perfectly natural thing to do though, chronic miscarrier or not. If you weren’t hopeful, you wouldn’t be doing all this shit.

    I really, truly pray that your hope is rewarded with the donor cycle!

  19. How difficult are donations? I’m 35 and I’ll be in the US for August. Is there a timeuable info page somewhere on donating eggs?

  20. Also: I’m very, very sorry you are in this position.

  21. I am just now catching up on your blog, and I am so very sorry to hear of your loss. So very sorry.

  22. There is always South Africa. I know it’s not as sexy as Nebraska but if you’d like a little safari with your donor eggs it can be had for less than you’d think. Without the weird glamour shots of young chicks. I got so turned off at the ‘industry’ here that’s how I ended up in Cape Town.

  23. DD- and I say this from my heart-
    can I donate? I don’t live anywhere around there but I’m done trying myself, is there any way that the eggs could get sent there?
    I’m totally serious.
    Let me know, as I don’t know what the process is like…I would totally do it.


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