no. 475 – There’s More!

Vacation details, that is.

What do you expect me to write about as I wait for a donor? Suck it up and just enjoy the ride. At least I’m posting more than once a month (if you thought that was a shot about you, then it probably was – post something, already!).

My Lost Wallet – Thursday morning of my vacation I went to look in my purse for something and my wallet was gone. How I didn’t notice it earlier is beyond me as the thing is comparable in size and weight to a brick.

We searched the beach house, boat, and all the vehicles three times over. Nothing.

I called the two place I had been the day before to check their lost and found. One was this department store and the other was this grocery store. No luck with either.

Friday afternoon, my husband got a call. The grocery store had my wallet!

When I went to pick it up it seems that the manager, RR, had kept it in the safe so that is why their Lost & Found didn’t know about it when I called. While that system could be improved, I was duly impressed with RR who called just about every customer service number on the cards left in my wallet until he got a hold of the video rental place in our town who in turn gave them Mr. DD’s phone number.

I plan on writing the corporate about what I certainly call going above and beyond.

Conservative Backlash – I’m a Liberal. I don’t know really what that means except I notice it more when I talk to a Conservative. What violent mentalities these people have! My husband’s BIL is one. He watches FOX News because he thinks the other ones are making up shit (FOX News, in my mind, is a bunch of overpaid and over publicized gossip-mongers and just a few news articles shy of being tabloid.

When someone mentions global warning, he curses the idiots who believe such crap. When they showed some media coverage of M. Moore’s new movie, he exclaimed, "I would love to see a picture of him with a bullet between his eyes!"

Chill out, dude. Who wishes something like that on anyone? I don’t know what Moore is up to but I do know that wishing for any other human being to be shown shot in the face is just W-R-O-N-G (unless of course it’s that sonofabitch who killed his unborn daughter and girlfriend).

Pregnant Niece, "Mary" – Surprisingly, this went exceedingly well. I wish we had had more time to spend together. She did say a few things that almost caused my palm-smack-to-forehead reflex, but I resisted.

She also said some things that I wanted to just hug her for.

She asked me if I feel jealous when others get pregnant. I admitted I did and that even thinking about spending time with her made me uncomfortable. She said she understood, and I know she does in some ways. She did lose her first pregnancy at 8 weeks after seeing a heartbeat and being assured everything looked well.

When we started talking about miscarriages I was trying to be nice and said that when others get pregnant easily, for example the couple who is just married and say, "We’re going to start trying right away so we can have a baby by our first anniversary!" and DO…well, they piss me off. I said that there’s a little voice in me that wishes something would go wrong, but I try not to think about it.

She said, she thinks about it all the time. She wishes it a lot. Even now at nearly 13 weeks pregnant.

She explained that its the Evil Mary, but that there is the Good Mary that wishes for the best. I realized, even though I have never really said it, that the Evil DD in me does this all the time. I wish not always for something bad, but maybe just a little scare. A little spotting. A little cramping. Just so that person realizes not everything is perfect in their lives. I’m jealous and I can’t always push it back, and at this point in the game, the person who expects me not to be jealous should also expect a poke in the eye.

One last conversation niblet Mary and I had was yesterday on the phone.

"Hey, Mary, it’s me DD."

"DD! How ya’ doin? Ya havin’ beach withdrawls?" [spelling to give you the southern drawl affect]

"Oh, of course! But I just wanted to let you know that I ordered your photo prints via W*lgreens and had them developed at the one near you."

"Thank you! I thought ya’ll were callin’ to let me know you got your boner."

"My WHAT??!!"

"Your donor. Why? What did you think I said?"